My Journey through Pregnancy and Childbirth in China.

Party of 4. photo: Zita

I am an African mom of two, I have been living in China for 6 years.

I created this blog and my Instagram page @zitawang15 to share my life experiences in China. Everything I write or talk about here and on my Instagram page does not necessarily apply to all Chinese people, because China is a big country where people in the north have different customs than people in the south. I live in northeast China, and my views are based on my Chinese family and Chinese friends around me.

Read on and leave a comment, let me know what you think.

PREGNANCY

Mia and Mommy. Photo: Zita

When I found out that I was pregnant with my 2nd baby, I went for my first check-up, and as my file showed that I had had a baby a year and 2 months ago, the first thing they asked was 'do you want to keep it?'', I couldn't understand, I had to make them repeat for 3-4 times, I was looking at my mother in law, hoping that she could rephrase it with easier words, and finally I understood. It heats me, it wasn't my poor Chinese listening, I just wasn't expecting that question.

In my opinion, if I didn't want the baby, I would have mentioned it myself. Don't get me wrong, growing up in a country (Rwanda) where abortion is illegal, "Do you want to keep the baby?" is a question you will never get asked, at least no one would ask that out loud.

Like many other countries, China has quite a big number of old wives tales about pregnancy and so many do's and don'ts, here are a few of them:

-Eating oranges will make the baby dark

-Eating grapes will give the baby big eyes

-Eating nuts will make the baby intelligent 

-Cold drinks, water, or eating anything cold is a big no-no...

-No spicy food

-Some pregnant women will stop driving throughout the pregnancy. I remember when my sister-in-law was pregnant, whenever she drove with her mother in the car, the latter would hold the seat belt so it wouldn’t touch the bump 🤔. I was always questioned for driving when pregnant.

-You can't carry your toddler if you happen to have one, and I always carried my daughter which drove my inlaws insane.

-Some people believe you can't swim when pregnant, which I found absurd because I've always read that swimming is the best exercise to practice while pregnant.

BIRTH

Welcoming our son. Photo: Zita

Where I come from, having a natural birth is the norm, unless there is a complication then, you get a C-section. There is no way you can ever get asked "how are you planning to give birth?''

Here in China, where the majority of women have birth by C-section, "how are you planning to give birth?" is a question you get asked often. It is so normal to just ask your doctor to give you a C-section.

When we were finalizing the payment for the birth (which was done a month before my due date), they asked me if I wanted to choose the date of the delivery and I thought I heard wrong because of my poor Chinese, so I turned to my husband and he said: You heard right, if you decide to have a C-section, you can also choose the date if you wish so.

It happens that some families due to their beliefs can decide to have the baby born on a certain date or a certain hour, just because that number is a lucky number. And this will even cost more money. You'd have to add almost USD 800 for that service.

If you have a natural birth like I did, even though I used epidural, people say that I am very strong😆. I am like, hello...I had an epidural, it wasn't that painful.

CONFINEMENT AFTER CHILDBIRTH

Mia and Mommy. Photo: Zita

Noah and mommy. Photo: Zita

In my home country, After childbirth confinement lasts 8 days, here in China it lasts 1 month, and during that month, you can’t go outside, the wind must not touch you.

-You are not allowed to bathe or wash your hair for the whole month.

-You must wear long sleeve tops, trousers, and socks..., some women go as far as wearing a winter hat, even in summer. It is said that the wind should not touch you or else your bones will have problems when you are older. 

-Again, cold food, cold drinks, are a big no-no.

-They also believe drinking pig feet soup increases milk production.

Although no doctor suggests any of these, at least my doctor didn't, people believe in them, especially older generations. I remember so well, after both my delivery, my doctor told me to avoid bathtubs and pools, but said that I could shower.

I obviously, as a foreigner I never followed any of these custom practices. With my first pregnancy, my in-laws would insist that I wear more clothes, that I don't shower, that I drink hot water and stay in the house, but I never did. I always said that unless the doctor said so, otherwise no way. With my second pregnancy, they have come to accept the fact that there are things that I will always do my way, that I can't follow their custom 100%, and they actually joke about it. They have concluded that black people are very strong because they have a natural birth and don't need a long after childbirth confinement period. 🤣

I am fortunate enough to have a husband who understands where I come from, living in Rwanda (my home country) for 7 years, and traveling to different countries made him quite open minded. He never insists on me following any custom practice that I am not comfortable with.